Archive for October 13th, 2010

13
Oct


What would you put in a time capsule to be opened a century from now if the subject were sexuality? How would you represent our eroticism? What objects would you use to help future generations understand us — and, for that matter, to help your partners understand you?

Here, in no particular order, are some suggestions. Have fun adding your own.

• Vibrator: These started out as a way for women to learn about their bodies and enjoy themselves. Now, millions of couples use them to expand their repertoire beyond intercourse.

• Condom: An incredibly thin, strong device that prevents both unwanted pregnancy and disease. Hard to believe they were illegal for unmarried Americans in the last century.

• Tampon: A perfect example of how life is easier when you’re willing to deal with sexuality and your body directly.

• Beer bottle: Too many people have their first sexual experience while they’ve been drinking. As a result, people often do things they regret. And, of course, it’s really hard to enjoy sex when you’re drunk.

• Electric bill: Representing the telephone, computer, VCR and other electronic ways we now express our sexuality.

• Porn film: Whether you enjoy them or not, they do show people smiling and enjoying what they’re doing — which is what we look like if we’re fortunate, and wish we did if we’re not.

• AIDS poster: AIDS has replaced Communism as the reason that people can’t enjoy themselves or trust each other. Interestingly, although most middle-class single people say it concerns them, most have never had a long, serious conversation with a partner about it. Honest conversation will always be more intimate — and therefore more difficult — than sex.

• Therapy bill: Sexuality is still the source of an enormous amount of emotional pain for many people. Whether because of childhood trauma, guilt, shame, and ignorance, or sexual dysfunction, millions of American men and women suffer about sex — and can’t seem to get the help they need.

• Mirror: One of the things that undermines sexual desire and enjoyment for many women is embarrassment or discomfort about their bodies. Unfortunately, many women have unrealistic ideas about how they’re supposed to look — or how their mates expect them to look.

• Lipstick: Remember when you used to love to kiss? As an adult, do you kiss as much as you like?

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