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21
Jul


There’s something unusual about Richard Brent. It’s not that he’s been married for 16 years, nor that he doesn’t drink or smoke, or that he’s 40 and still sexually very fit. It’s neither his performance, nor his prowess that make him the subject of this story as well as a document of scientific research. It is rather the uniqueness of his experience of sex that makes Brent unusual.

For as long as he can remember, Richard Brent has been multiorgasmic.

Richard Brent:

I think I started masturbating when I was 4. I didn’t ejaculate, but I thought Hey, this feels good, why stop, let’s have another one. I mean, it’s like a roller-coaster ride. Why get off if you don’t have to? I didn’t realize until my early 20s that it was any different for anyone else.

Many men covet a woman’s natural capacity to have more than one orgasm. Some envy it so much that they pursue techniques promising to bring them to orgasm without ejaculating. Most involve isolating the pelvic muscles and squeezing them right at the point of ejaculation. Does mastering these techniques make a man multiorgasmic?

Richard Brent: “Erection and Ejaculation Are Two Different Things”

I used to listen to guys talk about how many times they could get it up in a night. When they came around to me, I said, Do you mean how many times can I come, or how many erections can I have? Because for me that’s two different things.

Brent calls the multiple orgasms he experiences uninhibited pleasure. He uses no techniques or tricks to stop himself from ejaculating as he experiences orgasm. A full ejaculation follows each and every orgasm. Brent’s sexual experience challenges the traditional concept of the male refractory period or down time, during which a man loses his erection and must wait before he can perform again sexually.

Richard Brent: “I Don’t Have to Work at It”

It’s not the same thing if you have to work at it. I’ve tried all the techniques and I know it’s not the same. All those methods involve interrupting pleasure. Men don’t like interrupting their pleasure. All men would rather they weren’t limited by the Male Refractory Period (MRP), and were capable of effortless multiple orgasm, possessing the same sexual potential and capacity as do females! After several orgasms, I get a natural high, probably from the release of endorphins.

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Category : Blog
14
Jul


According to two recent studies, millions of Americans use one or more sex toys. We’re talking vibrators, dildos and butt plugs, as well as blindfolds, handcuffs and nipple clamps. We’ll leave whips and leather underwear for another discussion.

Like all technology, sex toys are an extension of the body. They are hands, tongues and genitalia that are bigger and stronger, and never tire. They are tools that help us give pleasure to ourselves and to each other.

Sex toys can be equally great for partner sex and masturbation. Any sex that can be improved by something that probes, stimulates, squeezes or alters sensation can be enhanced by a sex toy.

Unfortunately, some would-be users are self-conscious about feeling they need assistance. Others are concerned that their partner will feel inadequate. But this is like feeling self-critical that you need a comfortable chair to enjoy a movie. Our shyness about using sex toys really expresses the shame we feel about admitting we’re sexual in a sex-negative culture.

It’s no illusion. Until recently, for example, most national magazines refused vibrator advertising &3151; including Ms. magazine. And only last year, the state of Alabama criminalized the production or sale of “sexual devices marketed primarily for the stimulation of human genitals.”

Why the controversy about a 5-inch battery-powered piece of buzzing plastic? Sex toys are about sexual pleasure, not about reproduction or romantic love (although many romantic, loving people and couples use them).

A vibrator or nipple clamp in your hand is the smoking gun of pleasure — you simply can’t deny that getting off is exactly what you have in mind.

So sex toys are a vehicle for sexual empowerment; for learning about our eroticism, for pleasuring ourselves, for encouraging our partners to feel things more deeply. They are, literally, the way we take our sexuality into our own hands. No wonder so many authorities frown on sex toys and make us hide them under the covers. Using a sex toy is, after all, a political act.

And it feels damn good, too.

Tips:

  • Talk to your partner about your interest in sex toys. Make the conversation fun, not scary.
  • Remember, we use toys because we enjoy them, not because we “need to.”
  • To find a source for your sex toys, search the Web (there are dozens of choices).

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Category : Blog
7
Jul


Let’s talk positively about pornography

Last year, more than 500 million X-rated videos were rented in the United States. Unless this involves 500 perverts renting a million tapes each, porn consumers are a very, very large group. They are, in fact, us.Oprah, Jerry Springer, Ann Landers and self-appointed decency groups love to talk about the dangers of pornography: It warps your mind, destroys your marriage, steals your money and undermines America by turning regular people into dangerous animals.

Is this your experience?

There’s plenty to say about porn that isn’t being said. It’s fun. It makes masturbation hotter, heats you up for your partner, adds spice to a couple’s sex life, and makes many people feel more normal about their fantasies and preferences.

Perhaps most importantly, it validates a vision of sexual abundance and uninhibited playfulness. In porn-land, the actresses never say no, the actors never lose their erections, nobody’s ever too tired, angry, or nervous and the sex makes everybody smile.

A few fortunate people live like this. And some people explicitly reject such a world. The rest of us-the average Joe and Jane with kids, bills, bellies and sexual anxieties-desperately need a positive vision of sexuality. Men and women who have one need it validated; people who don’t need to get one.

It’s unfortunate that surgically enhanced actresses, improbable situations and silly dialogue are the main repository of the sex-positive narrative in this country. But it’s better than nothing.

Our culture is obsessed with narrowing people’s sexual options and compulsively repeating lies about sexual danger. Pornography is one of the few places the average person can go to behold positive, unapologetic eroticism.

When Washington, the Vatican, the TV networks, and the sexual disaster industry get together to provide a positive, loving picture of sexual abundance that will nourish people, “pornographic” excess will be left to cooking channels and home shopping networks. Until then, sexy videos, magazines and Victoria’s Secret will be a critical part of America’s mental health.

Don’t be ashamed of it.

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Category : Blog
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