Most of us don’t freely admit it, but kissing can be the most intimate erotic activity.

You can fantasize about someone else during intercourse, you can tune out a person giving you head, but it’s extremely difficult to ignore someone whose tongue is redecorating the inside of your mouth.

Kissing involves smell, taste, pressure, nonstop communication, and absolute physical proximity — a combination that most other sexual activities can’t match. The other person is so close he can’t be ignored.

Most adolescents love to kiss, but begin to lose interest when genital sex becomes an option. Pity. Kissing can be a satisfying way to have a profound and sexy conversation with someone.

Why do people let it slip away? Partly, its very intimacy can be a little daunting. When you’re kissing, there’s nowhere to hide. In fact, kissing can be an intimacy gauge. Kissing a partner we don’t like, especially an enthusiastic one, can be an awful experience.

Then there’s the issue of style. What if you and your partner like to kiss in different ways? It’s as if one of you is doing the mambo while the other waltzes. Some people prefer subtle and gradual — the stealth tongue approach. Others are more direct and even overpowering — the invading army approach. Neither approach is wrong, but each can be unpleasant to someone who wants something different.

Breath also plays a big role in couples’ kissing compatibility. If she doesn’t like the way he smells or vice versa, kissing can quickly disappear from the repertoire. In fact, since kissing puts us so close to another person, things like dirty hair, scratchy beard, nose hairs and scented makeup can all become key issues in reducing the desire to kiss.

As in many parts of sex, communication is key to getting the kissing thing together. Tell your partner what you like and dislike, and give specific examples. Yes, give each other a kissing clinic, experimenting, evaluating, and letting your partner know when you like what you’re getting.

Approach bad breath without apology. “I want to kiss you more, and would if your mouth smelled differently.” Offer to brush together as a prelude to affection or even sex.

If you don’t want to kiss your mate, that’s a different — and very troubling — story. Losing interest in kissing often indicates deep relationship problems, and is a strong predictor, in my experience, of sexual boredom or incompatibility. Because it’s so intimate and so potentially rewarding, a kissing mismatch should not be ignored. Raise the painful topic with your mate, or see a professional.

Kissing is supposedly how God gets people so close that they can’t see each other’s flaws. If you’re aware of how your partner isn’t satisfying you, talk it over as soon as possible. It will be difficult, but then you’ll have all that great kissing to look forward to.

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The vulva, otherwise known as the female external genitalia, vary in shape, size & appearance from women to women. In general, genitals vary from person to person. Different people’s genitals are similar enough that they perform the same functions but different enough to be uniquely yours.

Most noticeable of the physical differences between women and men is the fact that the male genitals are in full view, while the most important parts of the female external genitalia can be seen only if the woman spreads her legs wide.

Female Genitals

vulva female external genitilia Anatomy Of The Vulva: Female External Genitalia

Anatomy of the Vulva

The entire area of the external female genital anatomy is called the Vulva. You can look at your vulva by holding a mirror between your legs. The Mons, a name that comes from the Latin mons veneris means mound of Venus, the Roman goddess of love, is the area of fatty tissue that forms a soft mound over the pubic bone. The mons is covered by skin and pubic hair.

The Labia Majora, or Outer Lips, extend from the mons to the anus. They cover the urinary and vaginal openings and are in turn covered by pubic hair. The Labia Minora, or Inner Lips, are delicate folds of moist skin that lie inside the outer lips, although they can protrude beyond them. They extend from just above the clitoris to below the vaginal opening. They vary in size and form in each woman.

The Clitoris is an exquisitely sensitive organ that lies just under the mons. It is covered by the inner lips which can be gently pushed back to reveal the tip (the head or glans). The rest of the clitoris can be seen because it extends inside the body. The clitoris is extremely sensitive to stimulation and when stimulated it becomes erect. Although direct stimulation of the tip of the clitoris is pleasurable for some women it is uncomfortable and even painful for others. The Urinary Opening is just under the clitoris. It is the outer part of the urethra, the tube from the bladder.

The Vaginal Opening is located behind the urinary opening. During sexual stimulation erectile tissue on both sides of the vagina become engorged with blood. The whole area becomes moist. The pelvic muscles contract and relax during orgasm. One- to two-thirds of the vaginal opening is covered with the Hymen until this is broken by intercourse or penetration or another object or even bicycle or horseback riding.

The Vagina lies between the urethra and the rectum. Unless a woman is sexually stimulated the walls of the vagina touch each other. When a woman is sexually aroused a slippery liquid is produced and the vagina opens, or enlarges. The vagina can open as much as to facilitate the passage of a baby, therefore there is no such thing as a penis too large for a woman’s vagina.

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Reader Question:

I normally have yellow or white creamy vaginal discharge. Recently, however, I’ve been noticing a white jelly-like discharge, just like gelatin. Is this anything to be alarmed about?


This describes either normal cervical mucus or vaginal lubricating fluid. If there are no other symptoms (such as vaginal itching, soreness or pain), the changes seen are normal. Ask the doctor during the next pelvic exam to check the condition of the cervix or take a sample of the discharge if there is any concern.

The appearance and texture of vaginal secretions vary throughout each montly reproductive cycle as conditions inside the vagina respond to changes in hormonal levels. This is especially true of the mucus secreted by the cervix.

Cervical mucus usually appears in greater quantities midcycle, around the time the egg is released, and color and texture then differ from vaginal secretions during the rest of the month. This special mucus facilitates the journey of the sperm through the cervix into the uterus. In addition, the lubricating fluid produced by the vagina during sexual arousal also looks different from other vaginal secretions.

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