Straightening Out Erection Difficulties

While an erection isn’t necessary for sexual satisfaction, most men and their partners do like having one around during sex. Not surprisingly, then, erection problems and rapid ejaculation are two of the most common problems in my practice.

One or more of the following common dynamics usually causes such problems:

Conditions: Do you have the conditions you need to get or keep erections? For various men, these include a sense of safety, trust, privacy, affection, relaxation and a partner’s enthusiasm.

Performance anxiety: Do you feel pressured to get erect quickly, or to maintain an erection until your partner climaxes? Do you (or your partner) feel that the dependability of your erection reflects your level of masculinity, or of how much you desire your partner?

The relationship: Does your relationship offer peace of mind, emotional satisfaction, a sense of belonging? Or is it a place of periodic turmoil, in which you feel misunderstood, powerless, resentful?

Internal psychology: How do you feel about yourself, women (men if you’re gay), sex? Do you have unfinished business from a previous relationship, from childhood or adolescence?

When men want my help in getting or keeping erections, I start at the top of this list and work downward until the problem is resolved. And it usually is — erection difficulties and rapid ejaculation are among the most easily resolved sexual complaints.

I accomplish this by de-emphasizing intercourse and other sources of performance anxiety; encouraging communication before, during and after sex to demystify the erotic relationship; supporting self-knowledge and the entitlement to ask for what one wants; and helping clients develop insight into their psychological processes and character dynamics.

If you or a loved one is struggling with getting or keeping it up, see a professional before the month’s out. No man (or couple) should suffer unnecessarily.

Sex therapists, psychologists and physicians are the professionals best trained to diagnose and treat erection and rapid ejaculation problems. Herbs, creams, “aphrodisiacs” and gadgets are worthless for getting it up or lasting longer. Viagra doesn’t work for everyone, and it doesn’t solve psychological or relationship problems for anyone.

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One Response to “Straightening Out Erection Difficulties”

Okello Peter July 9, 2010

I wanna learn more

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