15
Sep


There isn’t anything that all men love, but fellatio — having the penis licked, sucked or kissed — comes close.

Most men have their fellatio preferences and dislikes. Generally, they love when their partner is enthusiastic, relaxed and knowledgeable. As with other kinds of sex, men dislike fellatio when a partner is too rough, too gentle, inattentive to feedback or seems bored or resentful.

Men also don’t like to feel pressure to get erect or climax quickly to validate their partner’s skill. You can’t simply memorize the “best” way to do fellatio. You need to learn the particular things that your guy likes.

Fortunately, many people who make love to men enjoy fellatio, and they have preferences too. To avoid gagging or sore necks, every couple needs to discover the most comfortable positions. This will often be mouth on top and penis on bottom, allowing the top to control the depth and speed of penile thrusting.

Some people like to pretend that they’re being forced to fellate, while others hate to have their hair pulled. Communication is essential.

Any discussion of fellatio must address two questions: ejaculating and swallowing. Some people don’t want their mate to ejaculate into their mouth; others are OK with this, but don’t want to swallow semen.

The person doing the fellating should get the only vote on these questions. You should be in charge of what goes in your mouth or down your throat. Any guy who says he feels rejected if he can’t come in your mouth or if you won’t swallow his semen is either spoiled or selfish.

How can you respond to such selfishness? “Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth,” or “I give you fabulous oral sex and you’re still not satisfied? Maybe we should forget the head altogether.”

You can invite him to lick his hand after he masturbates to give him some perspective, but remember, you don’t need a good reason to set limits.

Fellatio can, er, climax with him saying, “I’m gonna come,” and you stroking his penis while he does. Or he can come in your mouth and you can gracefully spit into a tissue a moment or two later.

Fellatio was glorified by the Greeks and damned by J. Edgar Hoover. You and your mate can make your own decision. Together.

Tips:

  • There isn’t anything inherently dirty about a penis, especially after a shower.
  • If your mate licks your vulva, you don’t “owe” him fellatio.
  • Feel free to pause or rest during fellatio, and to talk or cuddle if you like.

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Category : Blog
28
Jul


How can you get closer to the one you’re with? By understanding the many ways to ignite intimacy.

Intimacy takes many forms: verbal, physical, sexual, spiritual, says Klein. A relationship is all the more powerful — and intimate — when it features more than one of these forms.

Begin your exploration of intimacy with the verbal variety. There are two revealing questions you must first ask of yourself, and then a third you must ask of a loved one.

Once you’ve considered your feelings about getting close, you’re ready to hear the truth about intimacy. Everyone from Oprah to your best friend to Aunt Mabel has a different definition of it, and they’re not always right.

After you put the myths about intimacy aside, you’re ready to draw your partner closer. Spend time getting to know your partner’s dreams and desires. Learn to nurture your relationship, and you’ll keep the sparks flying.

Enough talking. Isn’t sex a part of intimacy? Our readers want to know and we have the answer.

If there’s one thing sure to spoil intimacy, it’s jealously. While occasional pangs of the stuff are natural in most loving relationships,persistent jealously will put out the flame in hearts once afire.

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Category : Blog
7
May


May 7th was National Masturbation Day. Did you miss it? Go ahead and celebrate today.

Since almost all adults and children give themselves sexual pleasure, the day is an opportunity for us to come out of the closet. But you won’t find any Hallmark cards or office picnics commemorating the day. It seems that most Americans would rather admit to having sex with their dog than admit to having sex with themselves.

We have no respect for masturbation. To begin with, the word comes from the Latin masturbatus: “to defile with the hand.” In today’s vernacular, when we want to tell someone to quit wasting time, we say, “Stop jerking off.”

What’s more, for 1,800 years of Christian theology we have been deliberately misled to think that the Bible denounces masturbation. In fact, there’s nothing in the Bible prohibiting masturbation. When Onan angered God by spilling his seed, he wasn’t masturbating; he was interrupting intercourse to prevent impregnating his dead brother’s widow.

Americans are uncomfortable about masturbation because we’re ambivalent about sexual pleasure that isn’t redeemed by romantic love. And, of course, we’re all taught that the point of sex is procreation, not recreation.

But this flies in the face of our personal experience. Masturbation feels good. It’s part of how babies learn to control their little hands (imagine that discovery!); years later, it’s how most of us continue learning about our sexuality. And women, in particular, can teach themselves to orgasm by practicing with a vibrator, pillow, running water or their own hand.

Adults use masturbation in many ways: to pleasure ourselves, comfort ourselves, maintain our erotic independence, experiment with new sensations, educate our partners. Masturbation isn’t a substitute for sex; it is sex — sex, as Woody Allen said, with someone you love. Or, as Betty Dodson says, “sex for one.”

As a sex therapist, I never ask couples if they masturbate. I’ve learned how horrified many people are to acknowledge their private habit. Instead, I ask people if they think their mate masturbates. It’s often the beginning of an intimate conversation they didn’t expect to have.

There are so many good things about masturbation.

Masurbation Tips and Facts:

• Experiment with lubricants and toys for some new feelings.

• Invite your partner to pleasure himself or herself while you hold and stroke him or her.

Popularity: unranked [?]

Category : Blog
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