Now it’s time to have orgasm without ejaculation. This takes more practice than the Kegels, and it’s trickier, but it’s worth it.

The key is to pull yourself to the very brink of ejaculation and then stop all friction. I found it helps a great deal to press myself in the perineum, the skin between the genitals and the anus. Some books recommend pinching the head of the penis with three fingers, but this didn’t work for me — the additional pressure sent me over the edge.

The first time you stop at the border, you probably won’t have an orgasm. But keep it up. Go just short of ejaculation, stop stroking and press your perineum, and wait until you’re in control again.

It’s tricky to find your personal boundary; the point where you’re maybe one stroke short of ejaculating. I would say I stopped at the border at least 25 times before I was able to have an orgasm without ejaculating. But it’s like being a budding X-Man: once you discover how to use your powers, it gets increasingly easy to use them again and again. Just call me ShudderMan.

Some books recommend trying this through masturbation first, because you have greater control. Luckily, I have a partner who was willing to take me to the brink orally. I think this works better than penetrative intercourse at first because just sliding out of the vagina can be enough to push you over.

Once you’ve mastered the technique, however, you can prolong vaginal intercourse until you’re both exhausted, or maybe until the kids have to go to college. When you do finally let go and ejaculate, the final orgasm is extremely intense.

So what are you waiting for? Oh, the restroom. Sorry, I’ll just be another few minutes.

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65b792127a26d017d637cc61b191c894 How To Perform Kegel Exercises

How To Perform Kegel Exercises

Kegel exercises couldn’t be easier to do, and once you’ve mastered the technique you can do them anywhere you want, for very short periods of time.  These are probably among the easiest exercises a woman can do, yet probably among the most important.

Follow the steps below and before long you’ll be doing Kegel exercises like a pro and enjoying all the benefits of having a healthy and strong pelvic floor, and experiencing much better sex:

  1. To begin you must find the right muscles.  This is done by sensing the muscles inside when you go to the toilet.  Try to stop the urine in mid flow.  If you can do this then you have already mastered the basic movement of your pelvic floor muscles.  If this fails then insert a finger into the vagina and squeeze the vaginal wall.  When you do this you will feel your muscle tighten and your pelvic floor move upwards; this is also the same movement.
  2. Once you know what your pelvic floor muscles are, what they do, and how they feel you can take a seat and begin.  Make sure you have an empty bladder before beginning.
  3. Contract the pelvic muscle as though you were doing what you did to identify them.
  4. Hold this contraction up for four seconds then relax for the same time.
  5. Repeat this ten times.

After a few days of this, or when you are very confident with it, try increasing the contraction length by a few seconds, and eventually build yourself up to about 10 seconds each time.  You can do these exercises whenever you want; even on the train on the way to work!

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