Is your relationship going strong or struggling for survival? Every relationship has difficulties, but some couples really are in trouble. Wake up to these common warning signs.

Avoidance. Like medicine, certain conversations are necessary for relationship health. If you (or your mate) keep avoiding certain topics, such as sex, money or chores, it means you don’t trust the relationship’s mechanisms for fixing things.

Some people avoid their mate in other ways: taking on extra work or community projects, always inviting friends or family to join them, or going to bed earlier or later than their partner. All of these create more distance.

Adversaries. The goal of healthy conflict is for people to understand each other’s viewpoint and make adjustments for the benefit of the relationship. If you are so angry that you deliberately say things to hurt your partner, you both have a problem.

It’s also a problem if you often feel defensive. Your relationship should be a place where you feel comfortable, accepted and trusted. If you’re always ready to explain or defend yourself, as if the next attack is just around the corner, the relationship is no longer your home.

That sour taste. You can gauge your relationship by listening to the way you talk about it with your friends. Do you complain a lot? Call your mate names like “ball and chain” or “Godzilla”? Are you jealous of your friends, wishing you had their life or their partner? Do you fantasize much about how great it would be to be single? These are all messages that your relationship is in trouble.

Don’t panic if you notice one of these warning signs in a week. But if you’re aware of several, or one persists, take action.

Talk to your mate honestly, even though now that’s the most difficult thing for you to do. If you can’t begin to resolve your problems, seek professional help. As with our physical health, many complex relationship problems can be healed if addressed in time.

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Our anuses are misunderstood. Loaded with nerve endings, the anus is a definite source of sexual pleasure — once you get past the aesthetic and cultural issues.

According to every recent sex survey, millions of men and women enjoy sexual pleasure involving their anus. Millions more are curious. A few simple facts can enlighten everyone.

Anal play can involve gently stimulating the opening, inserting something into the first half-inch of the rectum or going much further in — with or without vigorous movement. Some people dislike all three, some like one of these, while others like all of them.

The only way to know your partner’s preference is to ask. If you want to experiment with your partner, discuss it when you’re feeling close.

The three most important aspects of anal sex are lubrication, lubrication, lubrication. Use plenty before and during. Equally important is the initial speed, which should be slightly slower than a snail’s pace. Think of this not as an obstacle, but rather as an exotic, sexy part of the experience.

A person on the receiving end should keep relaxing the anal muscles from start to finish. You should communicate with your partner to ensure that any discomfort is immediately relieved, and that he or she feels safe and connected.

Anal stimulation can be combined with other activities: stroking the clitoris, inserting something into the vagina, massaging the prostate, role-playing or spanking.

Because the anus is part of a waste elimination system, care must be taken with bacteria. Never slip a finger, toy or penis from the anus into the vagina. And be careful with fingernails, jewelry and large penises.

Anal play is a time-honored activity that provides couples who communicate well an extra venue for their erotic exploration. You can’t get pregnant from it, which may be a bonus. And a few women consider it the primary way they climax.

Only you, of course, can decide if it’s something you want to explore.


  • Some people like anal sex because it feels naughty or taboo, a perfectly good reason.
  • There are specially shaped vibrators and dildos for anal play.
  • No matter how excited you are, never have anal play without plenty of lube. You could endanger yourself and not realize it until days later.


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Unless you’re currently with the person you’ll wind up spending your life with, sooner or later you’re going to have sex with someone for the first time.

Does this idea excite you, terrify you, confuse you — or all three?

If you prepare yourself and your partner, it can be delightful. But if you feel pressured, self-conscious, inadequate and alone, your experience may not be very enjoyable.

How to prepare? First, decide what the sex means to you. Do you see it as the beginning of something important, a casual thing, or friends essentially comforting each other? And what does it mean to your prospective partner? If you don’t know, ask. Make sure the sex means something similar to both of you, or there’ll be two unhappy people afterwards.

What kind of sex do you like? What does your new partner like? Talking about this ahead of time is exquisitely sexy, as you discover each other’s preferences, expertise, and fantasies. Are there likely to be soft words, rough words or complete silence? Costumes, blindfolds or spanking? Gentle caressing or athletic wrestling?

Talking about these things ahead of time sets the tone for the upcoming sex. It also helps you get to know your partner better. Is your new partner comfortable with his or her sexuality? Is he playful, serious or downright narrow-minded? Does she view sex as a creative partnership or just a collision of bodies without much emotional choreography?

Ironically, talking about the kind of sex you’re going to have can help you decide whether you really want sex with this person again or at all.

How someone talks about being sexual with you is probably a much better predictor of the erotic experience you’ll actually have than anything you can observe about her body or the way he sets up the bedroom. Listen, both to the words and to the heart behind them.


  • A friendly conversation about sex doesn’t break the mood, it helps create the mood.
  • Make sure you and your prospective partner mean the same thing by being sexual together.
  • Be wary of becoming sexual with someone who says he or she doesn’t want to talk about sex, but prefers to just let it happen.


A friendly conversation about sex doesn’t break the mood, it helps create the mood.
Make sure you and your prospective partner mean the same thing by being sexual together.
Be wary of becoming sexual with someone who says he or she doesn’t want to talk about sex, but prefers to just let it happen.


Popularity: unranked [?]

Category : Blog
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